


Totally Epic Origin Story of One Remus Sanders

by Dotdotbeepdot



Series: Sides Prequel Stories [8]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders has Intrusive Thoughts, Gen, Kid Fic, Mild Gore, Mild Self Harm, Pre-Canon, Realization, Remus being Remus, again more like teen fic, idk it’s not intentional but he is causing harm to himself so, lots of yelling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-16 19:33:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29954832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dotdotbeepdot/pseuds/Dotdotbeepdot
Summary: One mistake can change someone’s entire life.Remus doesn’t end at just one.
Relationships: None
Series: Sides Prequel Stories [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2074788
Kudos: 11





	1. Lets Start in the Middle

Remus was buzzing with unchecked energy. Everyone in the basement seemed to be hiding from him or busy with something else. Even Janus was taking one of his “Me Days” so he was ignoring him. Duncan hasn’t even shown up in days and Thomas’ current mental state wasn’t helping at all. 

He felt like his body might explode into a million, bloody pieces.

Remus winced and squeezed his arm tightly, consciously trying to stop the fast bouncing of his leg. He felt his chest burn and ache as he pushed the thought away. 

He always thought he would grow out of those thoughts. Roman did, after all. At least, he thinks he did? They haven’t really talked much since Remus had that one nightmare and kicked the shit― crap out of Roman in the Imagination. He just remembered when they first were thrown into the basement and he had mentioned these thoughts, Roman said he hasn’t had any.

Sometimes he wonders if Patton was right about him being the bad Creativity.

Remus freaking  _ hated  _ Patton. 

His hand tightened more, claw-like nails digging through the sleeve into his arm. This was all Patton’s fault. He cursed Remus like an evil witch cursed a tiny, sleeping baby. He acted so  _ innocent  _ about it too! The mother _ fucker―  _ he― the fucking _ bastard took Roman away from him and he was taking Duncan away and soon Janus and―  _

His ears exploded with noise and he stumbled off the couch, hand coming up to hold his head still. Remus looked around dizzyingly, trying to figure out what happened. There was a bit of blood on the wall behind him and when Remus felt the back of his head, he could feel it there too. He had hit his head against the wall to shut his brain up.

He hasn’t done that in awhile.

Remus looked around, making sure there really was no one around to see that and waved his hand to get rid of the evidence that that had happened.

He didn’t need Janus knowing about this or else he’ll get all sad and insists that they talk, even though he hates talking. He hated it when he upsetted the other more. He just needed to blow off steam, put all this excess energy to use in a non-brain-damaging way. Janus would be so proud of him when he tells him about this later. Look! He was choosing the healthier option, snakey!

Remus was about to go to the Imagination, hoping that he could run around and maybe fight some beasts or get torn to pieces by one, but stopped when he remembered that going to the Imagination never was considered healthy for him. 

Patting his hands against his thighs and bouncing in his spot, he tried to think. Maybe he could go to Janus’ room and calm down in his corner? He wasn’t sure if Janus would like that though, he did want to be alone today… 

Maybe he could try and find Duncan? Yeah! Maybe he could help distract him. Like when they were kids and he used to redirect his energy or bad thoughts to something else. He was so nice when they were kids; wonder what turned him into such a big stinky butthole now?

Remus sunk out of the basement and appeared beside his favorite Anxiety, not yet realizing that he wasn’t in the mind palace anymore. Not realizing that he wasn’t in the Core or anywhere else either. Nor that the other sides were staring at him in horror.

All he saw was Duncan’s eyes widening and him shoving him hard enough that he fell back into the mind.

**_“What the hell were you doing?!”_ **

Remus blinked, confused. Duncan was above him, blocking anything else from view except his furious and scared expression. His weird, echo-y voice was ringing Remus’ brain again, which did nothing to help his confusion. 

“What―” someone was panicking from behind Duncan. “H-how― how did he do that? Anxiety, he―”

“Did Thomas see him?!” Roman? Oh, good, Remus loved Roman! “I thought Deceit was supposed to hold him in!”

“He should be,”  _ That _ was Logan. Only one side could keep his voice calm while everyone else was losing their heads. “He must not be working―”

**_“Deceit!”_ **

Remus jumped as Janus jumped into existence next his still fallen body. He looked startled and out of place, wearing his comfy silk pajamas and a face mask. Remus couldn’t help a little snort. He looked like a little baby deer about to be hit by a semi truck. He noticed Remus because of his snort and then realized where he was and that everyone was present. He changed into his normal attire while Duncan screamed at him.

**_“Why weren’t you watching him?!”_ ** Duncan really needed to cool it with the scary voice, it was making Remus’ head pound more than usual. And he needed to back up a bit. Remus didn’t like being this small and underneath someone when they weren’t having some sexy fun.

“I beg your pardon?” Janus looked down at Remus again, not understanding what was going on.

“Remus almost revealed himself to Thomas,” that squirmy, panicky voice― that Remus was now uncomfortably aware was Patton― said. He revealed himself from behind Duncan and Remus tried to ignore his hammering heart at seeing him in this kind of position. “Deceit, that could have been really dangerous. You need to―”

“Who knows what he could’ve done to Thomas!” Roman shouted, and what?  _ Roman?  _ “He could’ve hurt him! We don’t know what could happen if Thomas were to see him! What influences he could have on him!”

Influences? Hurt Thomas? No― what? Remus would never want to―

“You are all making this a bigger deal than it is,” Logan tried interverring from the sidelines, but was ignored amongst the chaos as usual. “Deceit made a simple mistake and we’ll make sure―”

**“I knew we shouldn’t have trusted him with Remus,”** Duncan’s voice finally calmed enough so he wasn’t shouting, but his voice was still echoing.  **“They’re too close. Deceit probably let him out on purpose to scare Thomas as some sort of sick joke.”**

_ “What?”  _ Janus was rightfully offended by the accusation, glaring at Duncan. Remus was a little offended for him too. 

“Yeah, he didn’t do anything!” he shouted from the floor, bringing attention to him, which was weird because he could never get everyone’s attention. Honestly, it was kinda uncomfortable to have so many eyes on him. He wanted to keep them on him, however, he needed them off Jan. “Deceit was just having a day off! You can’t expect him to babysit us  _ all  _ the time.”

“He shouldn’t be having days off at all,” Roman insisted, glare sharp towards the snake side. “He can’t let Remus out like that again. If he can’t handle the responsibility, then we’ll get someone else to do it.”

Remus felt his heart stop in his chest. Why did Roman want him to be locked away? They were family, their only family really. They were the Creativity Twins!

**“Patton can do it―”**

_ “No!”  _ Janus cut him off with a shout as Remus stiffened. His arms were out to stop any more talk about the subject and they all looked at him expectedly. “No. I can do it. This won’t happen again.”

Behind Duncan, Patton’s shoulders slumped in relief.

“Come on, Remus,” Janus held out his hand towards him, still keeping a close eye on the others. Remus continued to stare with wide eyes at everyone as he took Janus’ offer to help him up. He noted how they all took a step back once he was on his feet. “Let’s go.”

Remus’ eyes stayed on Roman as they sunk out.

Once they were back in the basement, Janus let go of his hand and began to pace the length of the room.

“I was gone for one day, Remus,” he ranted. His hands came up to smooth and run through his hair, pushing back the cover that usually shielded his face. He was  _ mad.  _ “One  _ day! _ I can’t even imagine what was going on in your head that you thought showing yourself to Thomas was a good idea!”

“I didn’t mean―” he flinched when Janus spun around to interrupt him, throwing up an arm to cover Remus’ mouth with his own hand. 

“No. Let me talk,” he hissed. Remus nodded and Janus sighed. He shut his eyes and breathed for a few moments, trying to calm himself down. “You cost me a lot doing that. I was making progress with Patton and the others. In a few months, we could have been together again and  _ isn’t that what we’ve been working towards? _

“I could’ve lost my job too, Remus, I can’t protect you if I’m not responsible for you guys. And I  _ know  _ you don’t want Patton to be put in charge of us. He could make everything worse than it already is in just an afternoon!” 

He threw up his hands at the end of his tangent, not even facing Remus anymore with all his relentless pacing. When he did turn back around, he noticed that Remus still had his hand covering his mouth. The skin where Remus’ hand ended and where his face began had melted together and his eyes were frantic. Janus paled. 

“Stop.” He ordered, realizing what he'd done too late. 

Remus ripped his hand from his face, a pained shout escaping him at the tear of the mended skin. A bloody ring surrounded his mouth, a matching one around his palm and along his fingers. He shook and flinched when Janus touched his cheek. 

“Remus—” Janus stopped, his hand halted in front of him. He looked down at his hand and took his wrist gently, assessing the damage. He sighed, face filled with worry and exhaustion. His Day was cut short today because of Remus and now he was going to get mad and maybe lock Remus up so that he didn’t need to worry about him anymore and― “Why do you do this to yourself?”

“I don’t know,” Remus blurted out in an instant. He wasn’t focusing on healing so the blood still covered his hands and started to run down his chin. “I don’t know why, it just happens and I can’t stop it―”

“I never asked you to stop it, dear.”

“Everyone else has. They’ve  _ demanded  _ it,” he felt a sting of a tear making it’s way into the gashes around his mouth, reminding him of them. He brought up his injured hand and wiped away the tear as well as the wounds. “They don’t listen like you do. They don’t even try, they just yell or ignore me and I can’t do anything about it. I don’t want to be like this, please don’t lock me away―”

“I’m not going to,” Janus stopped his spirling thoughts before they could go too far. “I would never lock you away, Remus. As much as that sounds like fun, that isn’t what I’m about.” Remus let out a wet laugh. It did sound fun… when you're not the prisoner, of course. “But I am going to have to keep a better eye on you. I shouldn’t have left you alone like that, monster, that was my mistake.”

“You were just taking time for yourself, that’s okay! I meant it back there, they can’t expect you to watch us all the time! They don’t even care that Duncan―”

“I know, I know,” Janus smiled softly. He took Remus’ hands and flattened them on top of his own, palm to palm. “That was so very  _ cruel  _ of you to say Remus, but the others see it differently.”

Remus couldn’t even laugh at his half-truth like he usually would. Janus noticed, if his smile faltering meant anything. 

“Come on,” he whispered. “Let’s go to my room and calm down for a bit. Today was stressful for you, I’m sure.” Remus huffed at that. Understatement of the year.

His idea worked, however. It felt like he was squeezed of any energy after that. Janus was right. He had fucked― he had messed up. He didn’t think Duncan was with the others and he especially didn’t expect him to be with Thomas. He hasn’t been able to see Thomas since before the Split, so how was he supposed to remember that they could even do that. 

He didn’t expect the reactions from everyone, either. He hasn’t been in the same room with all of them since… ever really. They all were so much more scared then he remembered, especially their jumping spider and hopping Pat. Well, Patton was always kinda terrified of him, but Duncan, boy that was surprising. Even more surprising was Roman.

Roman… Roman acted like Remus was some big evil monster that he had to fight off in one big, dramatic battle. He thought Remus was going to hurt Thomas when he would  _ never―  _ well, at least he would never try to do it on purpose. He was just trying to do his job like everyone else! Did they really expect― did he really not understand where he was coming from? They were both Creativity, they couldn’t control all the thoughts that came to their heads even if they wanted to! He should know that Remus didn’t think shit through just like him.

“Why do you think Roman acted like that?” He asked after twenty minutes of silently coloring zombies and shadow beasts into one of the many journals Janus kept for his corner. 

Janus looked at him oddly, surprised out of his own thoughts, whatever they were. “What do you mean?”

“He was acting like a total, uh, jerk back there,” he knows that Janus hates it when he avoids swearing, but it was still hard to stop. “He said that I could be hurting Thomas? He should know I’m not trying to, right?”

“He should, yes,” Janus agreed, going back to his own tasks. He was sewing by the looks of it, a rip in one of his shirts. “But you shouldn’t expect that much from him. He’s been with the others for such a long time, and you know how they are…”

Remus perked up. He never thought about it like that before. “Are you saying Roman is being brainwashed?”

“Brainwashed?” Janus scoffed. “Sure, brainwashed. The Core sides can’t fathom the maturer sides of things and what does and doesn’t make someone a bad person. Just because you say things that can be considered―”

“Okay, cool thanks.” Remus got up from his couch, letting the coloring book fall from his lap and took off without a goodbye.

He had an idea.


	2. Probably Some Gay Shit

Roman saw the conflict in his brother’s eyes as he and Deceit sank back down to where they shouldn’t even be allowed to leave. 

“Anxiety is right for once,” Roman ignored his constant battling with the mopey side to agree with him on this issue. At least  _ this one  _ knew how dangerous the other two could be. “Deceit  _ cannot  _ be trusted with watching them anymore. Remus may be the worst of them, but we can’t have any of them getting out like that again.”

“Patton, you have to do it,” Anxiety wasn’t using that strange, panicky voice anymore now that they were gone, but it was still loud and demanding. He turned to their morality. “You can keep them under control. You’re literally in charge of right and wrong, and they’re  _ wrong―” _

“I-I mean, yes, but―”

“Okay, that’s enough.”

All eyes turned to Logan. Patton sent a thankful look with him.

“Patton doesn’t need to do anything,” Logan said, fixing his glasses. “What happened today was a simple mistake. Even if mistakes are…” he took a deep breath in and shrugged his shoulders back. “The bane of my entire existence, I must be honest here.

“What happened today was something long overdue. Remus has had influence over Thomas for his entire life, as well as the others, and them being prevented from showing themselves to Thomas could be more unhealthy for him than letting them out from the beginning.”

“So what you’re saying is to let them all out and maybe risk destroying everything we know about Thomas?” Roman laughed sarcastically. He looked towards Patton and Anxiety for support, and by the looks of it, they agreed with him. “What a  _ great  _ plan, brainiac.”

“That’s not what I was saying. You’re taking this completely out of―”

“No  _ way  _ are we letting them out,” Anxiety snapped. His hand cut through the air as he spoke. “Have you all forgotten that I live with those guys? They’re menaces. Who knows what would happen if they were allowed to see Thomas. If Patton won’t watch out for them, then I will.”

Roman blinked. “That’s… not a bad idea actually.”

Anxiety turned to him, surprised. He cleared his throat and shoved his hands into his pockets, hunching his shoulders. “Wh— really?” Whatever fury was fueling his fire, burned out and he was back to his nervous self. 

“Yes!” Roman threw out his hands. “Yes! You should watch them, keep them away. I mean, you’re big and scary—”

“I’m only like, an inch taller than you.”

“—You can help keep them away. You’re more trustworthy than that devious worm and…  _ him,” _ Roman grunted at the thought of his brother. “And they’d trust you a  _ heck _ of a lot more than they’d trust one of us to keep an eye on them.”

“It’s…” he started shaking his head, shrinking into himself. “No, no, it’s too much.”

“Too much what?”

“Pressure? Dishonesty? Just plain wrong? I’m not doing it.”

“Anxiety, you said it yourself,” Roman shook his head, starting to feel desperate. “They’re dangerous and Deceit can’t be trusted to keep them back anymore. Thomas isn’t  _ ready  _ for Remus.”

“Thomas isn’t, or you’re not?” Logan stated his question like a fact. He raised an eyebrow as Roman turned on him. “Remus isn’t easy to handle by any means, but I rather Thomas learn to handle him correctly while he’s still young, than have him continue to feel shameful for his intrusive thoughts well into adulthood.”

Roman was astonished. Logan was taking  _ Remus’ side  _ on this! Remus! He’s the reason why Roman is this way! He’s the reason why he can’t have a single thought that isn’t harshly criticized by himself and others. He hurt him. He hurt  _ all of them.  _ Why can’t they just understand him that Remus―

“I think…” Patton spoke up from next to Anxiety. He cleared his throat and laughed awkwardly. “I think we should get back to our rooms and calm down for a minute. I’ll go check on Thomas to see if he’s alright. Make sure he didn’t see anything he shouldn’t have.”

They all either nodded or grunting in agreement. Logan headed to his room as Patton sunk out and Roman was about to do the same, but Anxiety stopped him by grabbing his arm. He quickly let go as soon as Roman stopped and looked at him. 

“Hey, um,” he swallowed. “You wanna just… talk in the Imagination for a bit?”

Roman narrowed his eyes for a moment. “Why?”

“Just… look, I do want to help keep them away. I meant what I said about Thomas being better off without them. I can’t do it alone though. I still live with them and Deceit knows when people are keeping a secret or lying, so I just need some… help… if I want to do this.” 

He fiddled with his hands as he spoke, tugging his sleeve over his hands and back down over and over again. Roman always hated his fidgeting, it made him uncomfortable and stressed. Though, he guesses that’s the whole point of him. 

He didn’t trust nor like Anxiety entirely, but he was better than the others and if he was being truthful here about wanting to keep them away from Thomas, then it was better than nothing.

“Alright,” he relented, bowing his head shortly for Anxiety to lead the way to the Imagination. “What’s up then?”

Anxiety and Roman planned through the whole walk in the Imagination, only really disagreeing on a few aspects (such as Roman suggesting he takes the literal role of a knight to guard the basement, Anxiety called him stupid for the idea). For the most part, they seemed to be… getting along. Roman would be suspicious if he hasn’t been getting along with Anxiety a lot lately. Maybe Anxiety was getting better, maybe he won’t be so freaky for much longer with Roman’s influence.

Soon, their topics started to shift into more casual territory. 

“So are you ever going to give us your name?” Roman asked, hands buried in the soft grass he sat on. Best part about being imaginary in his opinion is that his nice white uniform can’t get grass stains on it unless he wants it to. 

“What?” Anxiety mumbled, pulling out small strands of the grass and letting the pieces fall back onto the ground. “Wh-why?”

“I dunno,” Roman said. “We know everyone else’s names, except you and Deceit. I understand why Deceit is hiding it, it’s… well, it’s Deceit. But you I’m not sure. You’ve been spending so much time with us, don’t you think it’s odd we  _ still  _ don’t know your name?”

Anxiety looks away, fingers still in the grass. He pulls his knees up closer to himself and tugs at his sleeves once again. “I don’t… I don’t know. I don’t think I should.”

“Why not?”

“Well, I’m―” Anxiety cuts himself off and thinks through his words carefully. “I haven’t decided on a good one yet. None of them seem to… fit me.”

“Hm,” Roman hums. Now, this would be interesting. He tapped on his chin. “Would you like me to help you? I  _ am  _ Creativity afterall. I can help find a name that fits you perfectly!”

“I don’t know,” Anxiety lowered his head, feeling uncomfortable with the situation. Roman wasn’t quite paying attention, already brainstorming ideas. “I think it would be better if I find it myself. I don’t want to be stuck with a name that someone else picked like you were.”

Roman snapped out of it immediately. “What? Stuck with?”

“Just…” Anxiety sensed he said the wrong thing, but he couldn’t say anything about it now. He’s already dug his hole. “When this whole naming business started. Remus forced you to take a name that you didn’t want because he liked it. I’m sure you like it now, but… I just don’t want to risk it.”

Roman opened his mouth, and promptly closed it. He tried to say something a few more times, but each time he was stunted. He… Anxiety was right. He had almost forgotten that Remus had picked his name out for him. Another thing that fiend had taken from him and he didn’t even know it! 

But he liked Roman, he couldn’t change it now!

He’ll just have to take this one back. Remus didn’t deserve a claim to his own name.

“That’s what you might think,” Roman scoffed, trying to act like he wasn’t searching his mind endlessly for a new meaning to his name. “Roman isn’t short for Romulus. It’s just Roman. As in romance, the romantic era, I was never Romulus. Roman isn’t like that, he has nothing to do with the bastardized twin.”

Anxiety smiled and huffed out a short laugh. “That does suit you more.”

Roman felt his shoulders relax. Good. Roman was no longer tied to Remus now. He didn’t need to be reminded of his brother anymore whenever someone so much as says his name.

He smiled.

There was a rustle in the woods behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ooo secy more lore.
> 
> I noticed that I made it (and a lot of people made it) that Roman's name means Romulus, but that was never the idea. I do like the idea still, but that isn't Roman so this is my way of fixing what his name meant so it fit with canon.


	3. Oh Fuck the Climax

Roman jumped to his feet as soon as he heard the sound, standing in front of Anxiety by instinct. They both stared at the rustling trees with tense postures, watching as the sounds came steadily closer and heavy footsteps crushed anything in its path. Roman knew there were monsters in the Imagination, they’ve always haunted his land and usually they wouldn’t attack unless Roman was prepared for them.

The cursed realm must be taunting him for not being ready for Remus’ attack.

**_“What was that!?”_ ** Anxiety shouted in a hushed tone, two seconds away from either jumping up and running or joining Roman’s side. Roman held out an arm behind him for Anxiety to stay put.

“It’s alright, they’re easy villains to beat,” the prince smiled over his shoulder at the increasingly fearful side. “Now you can see just what I’m capable of.”

**_“Roman!”_ **

His smile was wiped off his face when he turned back around and saw two red slivers of eyes staring through the leaves, several inky black claws digging into the bark and leaves of the trees. Large, slick fangs curled into a twirling smile as a third red eye in between the formers blinked open.

This was not a beast Roman was familiar with.

The face of the beast emerged from the shadows with a jerk of its shoulders and an echoing, hideous laughter filled the air, crawling out from the forest and charging towards them.

Anxiety darted off as soon as the creature moved, leaving Roman alone to fight off the beast. He summoned his sword, but the beast seemed unphased by the weapon. He wrapped three of his six hands around Roman, only laughing more at every slash and stab the prince aimed at his arms. He still bleed, more than Roman’s monsters usually bleed, but it didn’t bother the monster at all. 

He had Roman pinned easily, towering over him with saliva dripping from his teeth and falling onto his face. Even closer, Roman noticed details that he was even less familiar with. The creature had no nose, but three eyes that stretched and cracked through its skull. It had long, pointed ears that were covered with tears and holes. It had impossibly too much teeth that overlapped and pierced through its lips like knives. There were six arms total, four coming out of its back, and three legs. All with fingers that were more like talons than anything else.

This wasn’t his beast.

This was from Remus.

“Remus!” Roman shouted, ignoring how labored his breathing had gotten. He kept his eyes on the beast as he screamed for his brother, fear turning to anger. “Remus! Stop this right now! You’ve had enough fun for today!”

There was no response from his brother, but the creature did throw his head back and laugh again. He paid Roman’s struggling no mind as he made his way back towards the trees. Roman could feel his breathing getting worse, his heart pounding in his throat as he desperately tried to pull at least one arm out from where it was pinned to his side. His sword was still in his hand, now pointed threateningly under his chin and scratching at every beat of his heart.

He was going to die. If not by the beast, then by his own hand.

“Remus,” he gasped. He couldn’t breathe anymore. “Remus, please. Let me go. Let me go! I can’t― I can’t―  _ Remus!” _

The beast looked down at him as he screamed, looking almost curious. Roman felt his voice die as he met its eyes. He felt his heart stop as his mind raced with ideas on why it was curious. Could it sense his fear? Oh Zeus, what was he going to do to him?

He couldn’t remember the rest of their journey, too focused on keeping his breathing steady and to not fall into a panic. Because he wasn’t panicking now, he’s not. Worried or scared for his life. He can’t feel the blood welling up under his chin and slowly dripping down into his collar. He wasn’t scared to breathe and have the sword pierce through his tongue.

_ Why couldn’t he get out? _

All he knew was the beast had finally put him down and he crashed into a rocky floor. The sword doesn’t shish kabob his head, thankfully, but he still had a sizable cut under his jaw. He tries pushing himself onto his feet, ignoring how much his legs shook and how it was still difficult to breathe. 

It was too dark to see. 

“Where are you, beast?” Roman grounded the words through his teeth, ignoring the tremble in them. He held his sword in a defensive position and healed his cut, leaving a long thin scar behind.

“Hiya, Romy!”

Roman spun around and slashed through the air, hitting his mark. Once the haze of panic faded and his eyes adjusted, he screamed.

_ “Remus!” _

His brother’s body stood in front of him, gushing and squirting out blood from where Roman had cut through his neck, successfully decapitating him. 

“Nice shot!” Remus’ voice can still be heard and Roman let out another short scream as he turned and saw his brother’s head lying on its side in a puddle of blood. Remus laughed. “Wow, have you gotten taller?”

_ “What is wrong with you?!” _

Remus scoffed and his body turned, making Roman jump back. He picked up his head and squished it on backwards. He started making silly sound effects as he twisted it the correct way. The slash healed with a long scar taking its place.

“Nothing at all, Romy,” Remus smiled at him and Roman felt sick. “I’ve come to save you!”

“Save me?” Roman panted, confused. “From the beast?”

“Oh, that was me,” Remus chuckled, bouncing on his heels. “I wanted to save you from those motherfuck— the guys in the Core trying to brainwash you.”

“Brainwash?!” The fear was now completely out, replaced with nothing but fury. “What the hell is wrong with you, Remus?!”

“Deceit said—”

“I don’t care what Deceit said! You sent a monster to kidnap me, scaring me half to death  _ several times,  _ and accusing my friends of brainwashing me?! Brainwashing me for what?!”

“Because you—” if Roman was in the right mindset, he would’ve noticed how Remus was uncharacteristically unsure. “You were mad at me and thought I would hurt you? You know I would never  _ actually  _ try to hurt you.”

_ “You just did!”  _ Roman screamed. Remus flinched as Roman gestures wildly at the new scar on his throat. “You almost killed me! I thought I was going to die, you freak! Who fucking does that as some sort of stupid prank?!”

“I thought—”

“You shouldn’t be! You can’t be trusted to be able to think for yourself! I can’t believe Deceit hasn’t locked you away yet, you’re like a wild animal.”

“Romy—”

“Don fucking call me that!” Roman shoved him hard and took a few steps back as he fell. He held nothing but hatred in his eyes as he stared at Remus. “You don’t get to call me that. We aren’t family anymore after this! After you became this _ thing.” _

Remus pressed a hand to his chest and stared down at Roman’s shoes. His shoulders were shaking, but Roman couldn’t find it in him to care.

“Leave me and my family alone.”

He sunk out. 


	4. Some Fucked up Ending

Quickly after, Roman ran into Anxiety. 

“Roman, shit, are you okay? What—”

“Save it,” Roman pushes past him, heading straight for his room. “I don’t want to hear whatever fib or fable you have to say.”

“What?” Anxiety didn’t get the hint, following behind him. “What happened? Is this because I ran off? Roman, I’m—”

“Shut it!” Roman shouted out with a growl. He spun around to the other side and glared. “I don’t want to hear it! You were probably in on it with him! And to think I almost  _ liked  _ hanging out with you! I thought you could be trusted more than the others, but you're still just as evil!”

He slammed the door behind him, not wanting to see anymore of  _ them. _

He couldn’t calm down. He never thought Remus would pull a stunt like that. Kidnapping him? Hurting him? Causing him to― 

Roman shook that thought away. He wasn’t scared. He didn’t panic. Princes and Knights don’t panic when fighting villains. Panicking was for people like Anxiety, cowards and defeated evil grunts. Roman was  _ not  _ panicked. He wasn’t panicking right now. He wasn’t thinking about everything that just happened and freaking out about it. Definitely not. 

Oh, hell, what had he done.

He had said some awful, not very princely, things to Remus. He shouldn’t have said any of that. He didn’t mean any of it!

Well… Remus shouldn’t have scared― not scared, surprised him like that. And he shouldn’t have called Remus that. Even though he is a little bit of a freak, he was still his brother.

But he’s just so… 

Terrible. 

That sounded bad, he still loved Remus, obviously, but― 

It wasn’t that obvious was it? Roman did treat him like dirt, but that was just playing? Remus knew he never meant anything he said or did, it was just playing. Remus was weird and Roman teased him for that. That’s normal!

That’s probably what Remus was doing to him, today… he might’ve just been trying to play and took it too far… 

And Roman had said they weren’t family anymore… 

Roman swallowed and stepped away from the door, moving to― well, he didn’t know what he was doing. Maybe he was still reeling over everything and the shock. 

When did all this go so wrong? When did they change?

Had Roman ruined everything?

Before he knew what he was doing, Roman opened his door and headed straight for Logan’s room. He knocked continuously until Logan got tired of the sound and opened the door. Logan opened it on the 5th knock. That always worked, he hated it when people didn’t knock in a pattern.

“What is it―”

Roman barreled past him into his room and sat on his bed, leg bouncing. Logan raised his eyebrows at him and closed the door. He made his way towards him and took a knee in front of him. He didn’t say anything yet, searching Roman’s expressions first.

This is why Roman started coming to Logan now when he was feeling… not so good. Patton was great and all, but he was getting kind of distant lately and he was always quick to comfort and try to fix what happened. Sometimes Roman wanted to fight, he didn’t want things to be fixed, he just wanted to be listened to. Logan was good at that.

“Remus and I got into a fight today,” Logan nodded, telling him silently to continue. Roman sighed, frustrated. “I called him a freak and told him he wasn’t my brother anymore―”

“Which is understandably not true.”

“Right! Right, but I’m worried he might’ve taken it seriously. You know to never take what I say seriously.”

“Naturally.”

“Well― whatever,” Roman didn’t bother trying to correct himself. Logan never takes him seriously, even if he wanted him to. “Remus knows that and I know not to take him seriously, but I think we both took each other too seriously for a second… I think I might have ruined everything.”

“Now, don’t give yourself too much credit,” Logan moved up to sit beside him. “Remus is handling everyone's actions and censorship. You have the most influence over his actions right now― of course, as his brother― and your words might’ve been taken more personally, but everyone had their figurative hand in Remus’ actions.”

“Thanks.” Roman mocked a smile and rolled his eyes. Though he wasn’t acting like it, he did feel better hearing that.

“But, nonetheless, Remus is still responsible for his actions, same as you. If he had upset you and caused you to say that, then he should apologize and work past what happened just as you need to. You both have a tendency to say and do things without thinking. I’m sure you can get past this.”

Roman had a feeling that it wouldn’t. 

  
  


Remus could feel his  _ fucking arms. _

Jesus motherfucking Christ, that didn’t go as planned. 

He was still sitting on the cave floor from when Roman had pushed him. Probably sitting in his own blood from when Roman cut his head off. In any other circumstances, that would have been funny. But now, that was the last thing of his mind.

Heh.

No, but really, he had a lot more things to think about.

Remus swallowed and was suddenly hit with tears and hiccups. He dropped back onto the floor and gasped. His chest hurt in a way similar to when he was almost mailed by one of his beasts, or when he had accidentally broken through his rib cage falling down a hill into some rocks, or when his body was split in half and so did his entire life. Bottom line, it really hurt.

“I don’t understand,” Remus gasped out to nothing. No one was there to respond. “Janus said he was being brainwashed― he should’ve― he should’ve been―”

His rambling broke off into a whine and he gasped. His tears were creating mud under his head. Again, he would love that if it weren’t what was happening now. He was just disowned by his one and only family because of some stupid decision. He really was some kind of freak, he almost killed his own brother!

His own brother… that hated him.

Roman  _ hated  _ him. He was the one to call him a freak, he’s the one that said he should be locked up, all Remus wanted to do is save him.

What kind of messed up― what kind of  _ fucked up shit  _ is that?

Remus sat up. “Why do I care so much about that asshole?”

He pushed himself off the ground. “Roman is the one with a stick up his butt. He thinks I’ll hurt Thomas? I’m just doing my job just like he is!”

He stormed out of the cave and looked out at his dead and shadowed woods as he hiked down the hill. This is all Roman had left him after the Split. “What gives  _ him  _ the right to say that to me? I’m just trying to―”

He stopped. 

“Why did I waste so much of my life chasing him when he couldn’t care two shits about me?”

It’s as if he was amnesic and someone punched him in the face and all his memories came back. He’s spent all this time, wishing to be with Roman again and hating himself for not being Roman, wishing to be whole again, and didn’t take in the fact that he and Roman haven’t been happy together since the first week of their Split. Even the days that Roman humored him and played along with whatever Remus wanted that day, it always ended with Roman leaving suddenly because he didn’t like the game.

What the hell was he doing, crying over someone that didn’t cry over him? That replaced him and hurt him? What kind of bullshit was that?

Remus got out of the imagination and searched for Janus. He completely ignored Anxiety― who was down here again which was an interesting question for later― and found his friend at the table. Remus slammed his hands against the table, making everyone in the vicinity jump. He grinned.

“The goody-goody sides might not like us for a while.” He announced to the room. Anxiety and the others all looked up at him.

“What did you do now?” Janus asked with a sigh, clearly unhappy with the news.

“Oh, nothing,” Remus smiled and sank into the chair across from Janus. “Roman has moved on from me and I have too.” He threw up his arms in excitement. “I don’t care what he has to say about me anymore! Nor do I care what any of you other assholes think!”

“That’s nice, Remus, but do you mind explaining?” Janus set the book that Remus hadn’t noticed he was reading down. He was looking at Remus closely and he knows he’s trying to read him to find anything out. Remus wasn’t going to let him.

He jumped back up and paced around the room, patting the others on the head as if this was a game of Duck, Duck, Goose. “No, thank you! All you need to know is I’m not going to try and change myself anymore! You want the real Remus, you got it!”

“No one wants the real Remus.”

Janus shushed them. Despite him still suspicious of what made Remus come to this decision, he smiled at him. “That’s good, Remus. I can’t wait to hear― is that a new scar?”

“Oh, yeah!” Remus jumped on over towards the deceitful side and craned his neck, feeling and tracing the raised scar around his throat. “I got decapitated! Cool, right? It was really cool, Jannie, my head dropped to the floor like a sack of dicks. I think I still have blood in my hair?”

Remus combed his fingers through his hair, focusing on the dried chunks of blood caught in the back. He didn’t notice their stares until a hand took his wrist. He blinked back into focus as saw Janus’ pretty mixed eyes in front of him. He looked happy, which was more than he could say about the others.

“And you’re okay?” He asked seriously, raising his eyebrows. Remus nodded. Janus nodded back, relaxing slightly. “Okay, then tell me how it felt?”

Remus bounced and laughed, jumping into all the fun details on how it felt to speak like that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wooooo now you guys know how Remus and Roman fell out and how Remus became the man he is today.
> 
> surprisingly I don't have much to say about this. Maybe just that I need to figure out where to go from here. I would like to make a story about Virgil leaving, but I have a feeling that's gonna be addressed at least in the next video, but if not I'll write it. Might still write something about Virgil finally accepting the name Virgil or something fluffy because I've had a lot of life changing angst in this series.

**Author's Note:**

> finally Virgil’s third name has been used. After this fic I can finally get to the point where he’s Virgil.


End file.
